Friday the 13th

Over the past fifteen years or so, horror movies have become a sort of hobby of mine.  Now, I can't claim that it was a hobby of choice, because although I have always loved to read horror stories, the movies used to really bother me.  That was before I met my friend Dan...

Dan is a really strange guy.  Don't get me wrong, I love him with all my heart, but the dude is twisted.  For example, he has this theory about how shrimp are plotting to take over the world by leaving traces of their subtle bodies in us each time we consume one.  The idea is that one day a giant mother shrimp will rise up from its resting place on the ocean floor and control us all.  Anyway, he is the one who really got me interested in horror movies, forcing me to sit through "Re-Animator", "From Beyond", "Brain Damage", "Basket Case", "Rawhead Rex", "Hellraiser", "The Omen" and thousands of others.  At first, part of the enjoyment for him was to watch my looks of shock and disgust, but after awhile I actually started to enjoy myself, so he had to find his entertainment elsewhere.  

Well, this friday I went to see the new Friday the 13th movie and, while packed with a lot of the staples of classic slasher horror, I was disappointed by the over-indulgence in modern-day horror staples such as the one-liner,  the gratuitous sex scene and the overuse of drugs and alcohol.  In some ways, the film was more like a Red-Man and Method-Man film than a horror joint.  The most entertaining part of the film for me was the kid sitting next to me who kept shouting to his friend, something to the effect, "Hey...Mike...Jason go hard."  I can't be entirely sure, but going hard seemed to mean something like 37 different things.  If Jason did something funny, or scary, or he ran really fast, or he made some ubiquitous appearance, or he killed somebody in a particularly brutal way, this intrepid fan would shout, "Jason go hard."  Well who am I to say any different?